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Teletubbies Go Extreme! (All episodes)
TELETUBBIES GO EXTREME! EPISODE 1: " THE DAY TINKY WINKY FORGOT HIS CHORES" Over the hills and far away, Teletubbies come to play... There's Tinky Winky... TINKY WINKY: HELLO! There's Dipsy... DIPSY: HELLO! There's Laa-Laa... LAA-LAA: HELLO! And there's Po... PO: UH-OH! Together they are the Teletubbies, and they live very faraway in a land unknown... Today was Laa-Laa's first photo shoot for the company she worked for... Today she would be the model for a magazine entitled " BeautyTODAY!" PO: HEY! LAA-LAA! WHERE ARE YOU GOING SO EARLY IN THE MORNING? LAA-LAA: TODAY'S MY FIRST PHOTO SHOOT! REMEMBER? PO: OH...BUT ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE NOT FINISHING YOUR TUBBY CUSTARD? LAA-LAA: * ANGRY * WILL YOU JUST LEAVE ME BE PO? I CAN'T COME TO THE PHOTO SHOOT ALL ANGRY! PO: * LOOKS DOWN * OKAY...BUT COME BACK AS SOON AS POSSIBLE OKAY... LAA-LAA: OKAY! MAKE SURE TINKY WINKY DOES HIS CHORES AT FIVE OKAY... PO: OKAY...JUST BE SAFE OUT THERE OKAY... LAA-LAA: * ANGRY * OKAY...AND JUST SHUT UP OKAY! PO: O —- LAA-LAA: DON'T ANSWER THAT! NOW GOOD DAY TO YOU! PO: OKAY... Meanwhile... Tinky Winky watched his favorite sitcom..." Ninja in Regular City " TINKY WINKY: HA! OH MAN...THIS SHOW IS HILARIOUS! TELEVISION NINJA: SCREW YOU ALL! I'LL DO IT ON MY OWN! * BUMPS INTO WALL * (BACKGROUND LAUGHING) MARTY: NINJA! YOU KNOW YOU'LL GET NOWHERE BUMPING INTO WALLS... (LIGHT BACKGROUND LAUGHING) WINKY TINKY WINKY: THAT NINJA'S ALWAYS BUMPIN' INTO WINDOWS! * PO ENTERS ROOM * PO: TINKY WINKY! LAA-LAA SAID YOU HAVE TO DO YOUR CHORES AT FIVE! TINKY WINKY: YEAH...SURE...I'M BUSY WATCHING...I'LL DO IT AFTERWARDS... PO: OKAY...JUST REMEMBER! TINKY WINKY: * ANGRY * OKAY! NOW LET ME WATCH! That night... TINKY WINKY: IS THERE SOMETHING I'M MISSING OR THAT I FORGOT? MAYBE IT'S SOMETHING PO TOLD ME THIS MORNING. NAH! WAIT...ON SECOND THOUGHT —- * PO ENTERS ROOM * PO: * ANGRY * TINKY WINKY! THE HOUSE LOOKS LIKE CRAP! TINKY WINKY: OH YEAH! THAT'S THE THING I FORGOT! PO: EXACTLY...NOW CLEAN IT UP... TINKY WINKY: NO... PO: NO?! TINKY WINKY: ANYWAYS...ISN'T THAT THE HOUSEKEEPER'S JOB! PO: YEAH! BUT HE'S SICK! REMEMBER? THAT'S WHY WE'VE BEEN DOING IT FOR THE PAST MONTH! NOW IT'S YOUR FREAKIN' TURN! TINKY WINKY: * JOKINGLY * DON'T YOU USE THAT LANGUAGE AGAINST ME! PO: I WOULDN'T HAVE TO DO IT IF YOU JUST DID THINGS RIGHT! TINKY WINKY: JEEZ! IT'S JUST A JOKE! PO: THEN YOU'RE CLEANING IT? TINKY WINKY: NO! PO: YOU LAZY SON OF A TUBBY! ME, LAA-LAA, AND DIPSY HAVE BEEN WORKING OUR BUTTOCKS OFF TO KEEP THIS HOUSE IN TIP-TOP CONDITION! AND YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO SAY NO WHEN YOU HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN DOING ANYTHING TO HELP KEEP THIS PLACE CLEAN! ALL YOU'VE BEEN DOING IS OPENING BOTTLES OF BEERS AND WATCHING SITCOMS ALL DAY! OUR BBC SHOW MAY BE OFF AIR NOW, BUT IT GIVES YOU NO EXCUSE TO BE DRINKY WINKY! TINKY WINKY: DID YOU JUST CALL ME DRINKY WINKY? PO: YES! I DID! TINKY WINKY: * ANGRY * GRR! NARRATOR: THE FOLLOWING PARTS ARE CENSORED DO TO STRONG COARSE LANGUAGE...LET'S JUST CUT THE SHOW NOW...SHALL WE? FIN. TELETUBBIES GO EXTREME! EPISODE 2: " TELEVISION, SWEET TELEVISION " Over the hills and far away, Teletubbies come to play... There's Tinky Winky... TINKY WINKY: HELLO! There's Dipsy... DIPSY: HELLO! There's Laa-Laa... LAA-LAA: HELLO! And there's Po... PO: UH-OH! Together they are the Teletubbies, and they live very faraway in a land unknown... Today the Teletubbies gather to watch early morning television... They had no work on this day... PO: GUYS! SHH! WATCH THE SHOW! TINKY WINKY: THAT'S WHAT WE'RE DOING! LAA-LAA: TECHNICALLY, IT'S NOT NICE TO TELL SOMEONE TO DO SOMETHING WHEN THEY'RE ALREADY DOING IT... PO: OH! HUSH UP LAA-LAA! TELEVISION PREVIOUSLY ON SAMURAI SWORD... HIROSHI ALMOST TOLD HIS TRUE FEELINGS TOWARDS AKITA... AND A NEW SAMURAI CHALLENGED HIM TO THE NAME OF TOP SAMURAI... WILL HE STAY ON TOP? FIND OUT ON TODAY'S EPISODE OF SAMURAI SWORD! THE SCENES SHOWN ON THIS PROGRAM MAY BE GRAPHICALLY DISTURBING TO YOUNG VIEWERS... THERE IS STRONG VIOLENCE AND COARSE LANGUAGE... VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED... TV-14-LVSD NARRATOR: TODAY WAS HIROSHI'S FIRST DAY AT SAMURAI SCHOOL... HIROSHI: HEY! SENSEI! I COMPLETED MY TASK! WHAT DO I GET IN RETURN? SENSEI: DO NOT CALL ME SENSEI! CALL ME BY MY REAL NAME! * CHANNEL SWITCHES * TELETUBBIES DIPSY, PO, LAA-LAA: HEY! WE WERE WATCHING THAT! TINKY WINKY: IT'S STUPID! THAT'S WHAT ALL THESE CRAPPY ANIME SHOWS ARE ALL ABOUT THESE DAYS! LET'S WATCH SOME REAL ENTERTAINMENT! TELEVISION MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF—- * CHANNEL SWITCHES * PRESIDENT OBAMA HAS CO—- * CHANNEL SWITCHES * I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME MORE—- * CHANNEL SWITCHES * @#$% YOU SHARO—- * CHANNEL SWITCHES * WELCOME BACK TO PBS KIDS! TELETUBBIES DIPSY: HMPH! PBS TOOK OUR SHOW OFF AIR! THEY THREW US OUT ALONG WITH BOOHBAH AND ALL THE OTHERS! PO: NOW, NOW! THEY JUST NEEDED TO MAKE ADJUSTMENTS IS ALL! EVERY CHANNEL HAS TO DUMP OUT SOME SHOWS ONCE IN A WHILE TO MAKE ROOM FOR OTHERS...AT LEAST WE HAD A GOOD TIME WHILE ON TELEVISION... DIPSY: TRUE! BUT I THINK WE'D BE MORE WORTHY OF STAYING THAN BOOHBAH! I MEAN THEY DON'T TEACH ANYTHING! THEY JUST BUMP INTO EACH OTHER LIKE A BUNCH OF IDIOTS! AND WHAT KINDA NAMES ARE ZUMBAH, JUMBAH, OR ZING ZING ZINGBAH? IT'S SO STUPID! PO: DON'T SAY THAT! YOU SHOULD RESPECT THEM! IT MAY HAVE NOT BEEN THE BEST SHOW EVER, BUT IT MADE ITS WAY ONTO TELEVISION! JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT AS POPULAR AS US, DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO TALK SO RUDELY ABOUT THEM! TINKY WINKY: OOH! LOOK RUFF RUFFMAN IS SHOWING! WE WERE MUCH BETTER THAN HIS DOG BUTT! I WANNA KICK HIM RIGHT OUT OF TELEVISION! PO: WILL YOU STOP? IT'S NOT NICE! TINKY WINKY: THESE CHARACTERS MAKE THE SHOWS SO DUMB! DIPSY: SO SAYS THE GUYS WHO CARRIES A PURSE AROUND AND HAS THE GAY SYMBOL ON HIS HEAD THAT CAUSED OUR SHOW TO HAVE SO MANY CONTROVERSIALS! TINKY WINKY: THE DIRECTOR TOLD ME TO HOLD ONE! DIPSY: OH...THAT'S RIGHT...YEAH... PO: GUYS! I FOUND A GOOD SHOW! TELEVISION THEME SONG: Nín hao! Nín hao! Wo shuo: Nín hao! Bùyào zou! Bùyào zou! Yinwèi wo shuo de! Wo shuo hao! Ba ni de shouzhi yi pái! Zài yi pái! Bùyào wàng le shuo, ó! TELETUBBIES PO: IT'S CHINESE! GOOD! I UNDERSTAND IT! I SPENT FIVE YEARS LEARNING IT! TELEVISION Gang sha ni de yanjing! Bié wàng le! Nín hao! Nín hao! Huanyíng! Jìnlái yi pái! Bì shàng ni de yanjing! Fú, ér shì yòng xin de tudì! Nín hao, wo de míngzì de chénguang! Huanyíng lái dào zhongguó hongbèi zhan! Jintian, women jiang zhu le meiwèi de jiaozi hao! Wo de yìsi shì cóngtóu kaishi! Women kaishi hao ma? TELETUBBIES PO: SHE'S ABOUT TO COOK UP SOME DUMPLINGS! DIPSY: HOW DO YOU KNOW? PO: BECAUSE I UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE'S SAYING... TELEVISION Jintian, wo you yigè bangshou! Ta de míngzì shì chunxi, ta lái zì hánguó du zhèyàng! Chunxi? Ni rúhé kaishi yigè jiaozi? dangsin-eun jung-gug-eo banjug-ui dansunhan hyeongsig-eulo sijaggwa hamkke maesi! geuleom ... dangsin-ui doum-i pil-yo haeyo! jeongmal mian haeyo! Wo lái fanyì yixià ta de shuofa, yinwèi nimen dangzhong youxie rén bù zhidào ta zài shuo... TELETUBBIES PO: SHE JUST SAID SHE'LL TRANSLATE THE KOREAN GUY, SO THE VIEWERS CAN UNDERSTAND... TINKY WINKY: WAIT! THE GUY'S KOREAN? PO: YEAH! SHE SAID IT ALREADY! TINKY WINKY: WELL...SHEESH! I DON'T UNDERSTAND CHINESE NOR KOREAN! PO: I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S GOING ON THROUGHOU—- TINKY WINKY: NO! WE'RE WATCHING THIS! TELEVISION * CHANNEL SWITCHES * NEWS: IT WAS ABOUT 10 A.M. IN THE MORNING, WHEN A GUNMAN CLEARLY SHOT ONE MAN AND THREW HIS BODY INTO AN AREA POLICE STILL CAN'T FIND. THE SHOOTER WAS REPORTED TO HAVE BEEN 5' 6'' AND WORE A LARGE COAT. NO ONE REALLY KNOWS WHO HE IS OR WHAT. THIS IS MARIETTE LAMINITO AND NOW BACK TO YOU MARTIN! MARTIN: WELL...WE STILL CAN'T SEEM TO KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE IN CHINA. TWO WOMEN WERE ORDERED TO GO IN ONE DIRECTION AND THEN DISAPPEARED, AND WERE NEVER SEEN BY ANYONE AGAIN! EVEN THEIR OWN FAMILY! AS YOU CAN SEE, THERE IS A LOT OF POLICEMEN OUT THERE—- TELETUBBIES LAA-LAA: I'M NOT WATCHING DEPRESSING NEWS! PO: CAN WE ALL JUST STICK TO ONE CHANNEL? AND THAT'S WHAT THE TELETUBBIES DID ON THEIR DAY-OFF... FIN. TELETUBBIES GO EXTREME! EPISODE 3: " VISIT TO THE GROCERY STORE " Over the hills and far away, Teletubbies come to play... There's Tinky Winky... TINKY WINKY: HELLO! There's Dipsy... DIPSY: HELLO! There's Laa-Laa... LAA-LAA: HELLO! And there's Po... PO: UH-OH! Together they are the Teletubbies, and they live very faraway in a land unknown... TODAY WAS PO'S TURN TO GO GROCERY SHOPPING... SHE HAD PLANNED OUT WHAT SHE WOULD BE BUYING AHEAD OF TIME... PO: OKAY...PRIORITY IS EGGS, MEATS, MILK, WATER, AND OF COURSE FISH... LADY: Hola! Necesito ayuda con el pan! ¿Puedes ayudarme a leer esto? PO: I DON'T SPEAK SPANISH...SORRY... * PO WALKS TOWARDS MEATS AISLE * PO: OKAY, THERE'S BACON...YEAH...I NEED THAT...STEAK...YEAH...UMM...I ALSO NEED GROUND BEEF...OKAY...HMM...AND I ALSO NEED...UMM...I NEED...OH YEAH...CHICKEN! THERE YOU GO! TOGETHER THAT'S ALL $ 13.99... NOW LET'S GO GET SOME EGGS! * PO WALKS TOWARDS EGGS AISLE * PO: THERE YOU GO...EGGS... NOW I NEED FISH! * PO WALKS TOWARDS FISH AISLE * PO: HMM...SALMON...TILAPIA...TUNA....GOOD...THAT'S ALL THE FISH I NEED! NOW I NEED SOME MILK! * PO WALKS TO MILK AISLE * PO: OKAY...GOT THAT... NOW I NEED SOME WATER... * PO WALKS TO WATER AISLE * PO: I'LL GET THREE...GOOD... NOW SNACKS... PO: SOME OREOS, FORTUNE COOKIES, M'N'Ms, AND SOME COTTON CANDY PACKS...THERE... NOW FOR SOME—- WAIT! THAT'S IT! OH! WAIT! NO! CEREAL! * PO RUNS TO CEREAL AISLE * PO: OKAY...COOKIE CRISPS, FROSTED MINI WHEATS, HONEYNUT CHEERIOS, AND SOME FROSTED FLAKES...THERE... * PO TRAMPLES TOWARDS CASH REGISTER PERSON * PO: HERE...I'LL BUY THIS ALL... CASH REGISTER LADY: UMM...THAT'LL BE $ 69.23... PO: * SWEATING * HERE...IT'S IN MY HAND... * PO RETURNS HOME * PO: GUYS! I BROUGHT SOME FOOD! TINKY WINKY: OH BOY! I'M STARVING! AND THAT'S THE DAY PO WENT GROCERY SHOPPING... FIN. TELETUBBIES GO EXTREME! EPISODE 4: " NO DAY LIKE SNOW DAY " Over the hills and far away, Teletubbies come to play... There's Tinky Winky... TINKY WINKY: HELLO! There's Dipsy... DIPSY: HELLO! There's Laa-Laa... LAA-LAA: HELLO! And there's Po... PO: UH-OH! Together they are the Teletubbies, and they live very faraway in a land unknown... Every year, the Teletubbies would experience the birth of winter... In turn, the birth of winter will give rise to snow... DIPSY: WOW! CHECK THIS OUT GUYS! IT'S A WINTER WONDERLAND! TINKY WINKY: YOU'RE RIGHT! DIPSY: I AM! PO: WHAT'S GOING ON OUT HERE? DIPSY: I DISCOVERED SNOW! IT MUST BE WINTER! PO: OH YEAH! THE WEATHER MAN ON THE NEWS YESTERDAY SAID THIS WOULD HAPPEN! DIPSY: ISN'T IT AMAZING PO? PO: YEAH, BUT LET'S EAT BREAKFAST BEFORE WE PLAY AROUND! I COOKED SOME BACON, SAUSAGE, AND EGGS! DIPSY: YUMMY! THIS IS GOOD! TINKY WINKY: I KNOW! SO GOOD! PO: WELL, LET'S EAT IT SOME MORE THEN... DIPSY: WAY AHEAD OF YOU! TINKY WINKY: WHERE'S LAA-LAA? PO: SHE LEFT TO WORK EARLY FOR A MEETING... DIPSY: SHE HAD TO DRIVE IN ALL THAT SNOW! I CAN IMAGINE AT JUST HOW SCREWED SHE IS RIGHT NOW! PO: LET'S EAT GUYS! DIPSY: I AM! TINKY WINKY: I'M DONE! DIPSY: SO AM I! DIPSY, TINKY WINKY: THANKS FOR THE MEAL PO! DIPSY: LET'S BUILD A SNOWMAN! PO: * THINKING * SIGH...THOSE TWO ARE ALWAYS SO EAGER TO PLAY IN THE SNOW EVERY YEAR... DIPSY: HEY! TINKY WINKY! DO IT LIKE THIS! TINKY WINKY: IS THIS GOOD? DIPSY: SHAPE IT A LITTLE MORE INTO A BALL! IT LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING THAT SHOULD BE IN A TOILET! TINKY WINKY: HOW'S THIS? DIPSY: PERFECT! NOW PUT IT ON TOP OF THE SNOWMAN...IT'LL SERVE AS HIS HEAD! MEANWHILE... LAA-LAA: DRIVING IN THIS SNOW IS PISSING ME OFF! I WISH THERE WOULD BE A SNOW SWEEPER ALREADY! MAN IN CAR: HEY LADY! WILL YOU HURRY IT UP? THERE'S OTHER PEOPLE THAT NEED TO WORK BESIDES YOU! LAA-LAA: SHUT UP! I ALREADY MISSED MY FOUR-HOUR MEETING BY ONE HOUR! MAN IN CAR: THEN WHY DON'T YOU HURRY IT UP?! LAA-LAA: IT'S NOT ME! IT'S THE GUY IN FRONT OF ME! OPEN YOUR EYES, YOU OLD LADY! MAN IN CAR: I'M NOT AN OLD PERSON...I'M 37 YEARS OLD, MORON! LAA-LAA: I DON'T CARE! MAN IN CAR: AND BY THE WAY, I'M NOT A LADY EITHER! I'M A MAN! BACK AT HOME... PO: I GUESS I'LL READ SOME OF MY COMIC BOOKS...OR MAYBE WATCH SOME TV... * PO SWITCHES ON TELEVISION * PO: OH! MY FAVORITE SHOW IS ON! TELEVISION THEME SONG: Anata wa arimasu ka? Dare? Subete no watashi no jinsei koko de matte ita! Tasukete kudasai! Watashi wa mukashi no jibun no karada! Watashi wa mite wa ikenai mono o mite! Satsugai no koto wa watashi wa koroshite wa naranai! Shite kudasai! A, onegai! Tasukete kure! Jigoku e no michi o soko! Kumo ni totatsu suru no o matsu koto ga dekimasen! Hi no naka ni shuriken o nageru! Watashi o tomete kudasai! Kono boido no watashi o motte ikou! Mo chucho shinaide kudasai! Anata to watashi o o wasurenaku! Ga appu! Watashi wa watashi no kokoro no saji to dogo o kanjite iru! Anata no me o kuishiba~tsu to no tatakai ni chokumen suru! Anata no yuiitsu no kibo o akiramete wa ikenai! Subete no anata no aisuru --mono wa, heiwa no uchi ni shinute miyou! Ken ya ju o te ni motte ikou! Chigai! Watashi wa pesu ni oitsuite inai koto ga dekimasu! Yokoso watashi no kokoro! Hoki ikari to ikari ga! A watashi wa tasukete kudasai! Node, watashi wa subete no watashi no jinsei o tatakatte kita! Junsa bucho no yona kibishii kotoba ga kao! A ¯ mo! Watashi no jinsei o tasukete! Subete no nozomi ga kieta! Watashi wa chikyu-jo no subete no watashi no saigo no hi o mite kimashita! Soshite, sore wa watashi no jinsei wa heisa sa re-so! Chikatte wa ikenai! Kasu shinaide kudasai! A, onegai! Amarini mo kimi no tedasuke o shite! SUBTITLES: Are you there? Anybody? Been waiting here all my life! Please help me! I'm a shell of my former self! Seeing things I shouldn't see! Killing things I shouldn't kill! Please! Oh please! Help me! Traveling on the road to hell! Can't wait to reach the clouds! Throwing shurikens into the fire! Please stop me! Take me out of this void! Do not hesitate anymore! Bring me with you! Up there! I'm feeling my heart surge and roar! Grit your eyes and face the battle! Do not give up on your only hope! Let all your loved-ones die in peace! Take hold of a sword or gun! No difference! I just can't keep up with the pace! Welcome my heart! Abandon the fury and rage! Oh help me please! Because I've been fighting all my life! Face the harsh words like a sergeant! Oh no! Help my life! All hope is gone! I've seen all my last days on the earth! And it seems my life is closing down! Don't swear! Don't cuss! Oh please! Been helping you too! NARRATOR: PREVIOUSLY... MAKOTO: I'M SORRY! I WAS WRONG TO FACE YOU SO HARSHLY! EMPEROR: THEN THINK OF YOUR PUNISHMENT! THEN TELL ME HOW YOUR HEART CONNECTS TO ALL OF THIS! * SWITCHING SCENE * ICHIGO: NO! I'LL FACE THE EMPEROR ALONE! CHIZUKO: NO! DON'T DO IT! IF YOU DO THAT... MIGHT AS WELL, ABANDON ALL OF YOUR HOPE! ICHIGO: THEN...I WILL... * SWITCHING SCENE * CHIZUKO: NO! ICHIGO! EMPEROR: SEE! I TOLD YOU FACING ME WOULD BE AN ORDEAL! * SHOW COMING ON * ICHIGO: CH-CHIZUKO...G-GET M-MY...S-SWORD...OVER...OVER...TH-THERE... CHIZUKO: NO! I'LL BATTLE HIM! ICHIGO: N-NO...I WON'T LET YOU! I-IT'S W-WAY TOO DANGEROUS! EMPEROR: GO AHEAD LITTLE GIRL! STAB ME IN THE HEART FOR ALL I CARE! CHIZUKO: WITH PLEASURE! ICHIGO: N-NOOO! * CHIZUKO SHOCKED WITH LIGHTNING * ICHIGO: * THINKING * CHIZUKO...CHIZUKO... * ICHIGO DIES * * CHIZUKO DROPS TO THE GROUND * EMPEROR: I'VE FINALLY KILLED THEM BOTH! NOW TI—- * TELEVISION SWITCHES OFF * TELETUBBIES PO: NAH! I'LL JUST READ A GOOD OL' BOOK...OR I'LL JOIN DIPSY AND TINKY WINKY! * PO GOES OUTSIDE * PO: GUYS! YOU KNOW WHAT? DIPSY, TINKY WINKY: WHAT? PO: WHAT AM I DOING INSIDE? I THINK BEING OUTSIDE WITH THE TWO OF YOU IS BETTER! DIPSY: YAY! TINKY WINKY: LET'S MAKE A BETTER AND BIGGER SNOWMAN! DIPSY: WAY AHEAD OF YOU PAL! AND THAT'S HOW THE TELETUBBIES SPENT THEIR WINTER, FROLICKING AROUND IN THE SNOW... AND, OF COURSE, WAITING FOR SANTA CLAUSE TO APPEAR... ALL EXCEPT FOR WORKAHOLIC LAA-LAA... FIN.